I had been told long ago, by my British ballet instructor, that a Brit always knows a North American by the way they eat. You see, North Americans cut with the fork in their left hand and then change over to the right hand. Then, using the fork like a shovel, scoop the food and put it in their mouth on the top side of the fork. The British cut with the fork in the left and leave the fork in the left hand. Then they gently push the food onto the back of the fork with the knife. No scooping allowed. Well, the South Africans knew that I was North American the same way.
One day, on our look and see visit in February, we went to a Wimpy's. It's a burger joint, with take out, but it also has serviced tables. So, we sat down and looked at the menu. All day breakfast platters, cool. Burgers, awesome. We gave the waitress our order, all of us trying a different type of burger. When the waitress returned with our drinks, she also brought us cutlery. Weird, who needs cutlery to eat a hamburger? Too nervous to ask the bosses wife why this would be, I surreptitiously started to check out the other patrons. Well, look at that, they were eating their burgers with a fork and knife. They were cutting bun, patty and toppings into little bite sized pieces before eating them with their fork in the left hand. I can tell you, this was not what I wanted to see. Criminy, here I was moving to this new country, it was going to be hard enough to get used to new foods, but now I had to learn a new way to eat the old ones too. Sigh.
At that point I had a dilemma. Apparently, the proper way to eat a burger in Port Elizabeth was with a fork and knife, which was not the way that I was used to eating a burger. I didn't want to look uncultured in front of the bosses wife, who had been our tour guide for the day. So I compromised, I ate with a fork and knife, but still switched my fork to the right hand. Baby steps. After all I was only visiting. Besides, I figured, better to switch my fork than use my left hand and risk missing my mouth completely.
After we returned to Canada I made a concerted effort to keep my fork in my left hand, and it has gone rather well.
The thing about hamburgers here is, they are messy. It's not a nice little dab of ketchup and a tablespoon of onions. The toppings spill out all over the place and the buns are usually really soft. When you're eating with a fork and knife it doesn't matter how messy the burger is. So, in most places a fork and knife are a must, even for burgers.
But, what to do about the children. I admit, I indulged them in Canada. I cut thier food up for them most of the time, so they only ever needed a fork. They are all right handed so that's where the fork went. It was really a time and sanity saver for me. With 3 kids, just 4 1/2 years apart, it was easier to cut up thier meals all at the same time and serve it to them that way. DS #1 had been using a knife for about a year before we left. DS #2 was just starting and DD had a completely dull knife for soft foods like eggs or pierogies, but didn't use it regularly. Foods like chicken nuggets, french fries, hot dogs, pizza and burgers were finger foods.
A couple of weeks ago DS #2 came home with a copy of Kids Connection, which was distributed to all the kids at school. It's a magazine with kids products, advertisements and some articles. The lead article was on table manners. Things like, how to teach them and when you should start. When I read the article I realized that my kids have a lot of catching up to do. Then, I put the magazine in a really safe place, so that I could reference it. Unfortunately, I can't for the life of me remember where that safe place is, so until I find that article or it's posted online, we continue to work on the fork in the left hand rule. Or maybe, I can just sign them up for those extra curricular deportment classes that the school offers and they can teach them all the South African table manners they could possibly need.
So, with all these expectations about table manners, where can I go to feel like I'm home again. McDonald's. Yup, they have them here, too. The burgers aren't sloppy and they don't give you a fork and knife. If I ever feel like a good old, back home, eat with your hands meal, that's where I go. We've only been there 3 times, so the need hasn't been too great, but in the back of my mind, I know, that there is an island of respite from the table manners police and it is called McDonald's.
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